Cowboys Continue To Crash: Tony Romo Out For Four Weeks

The Monday morning "OMG IT'S LIVE SO IT'S OBVIOUSLY WORTH WATCHING NOW" SportsCenter program came in handy for the first time in recent memory. And old memory. Or whatever the opposite of recent memory is. Michael Smith broke the story that America's Team's, America's quarterback Tony Romo is going to miss four weeks due to a broken finger. There are so many dirty ways to take a story about Jessica Simpson's boy toy having a broken finger, none of which I will expand upon in this here blog space. If you care about the fantasy impact though, this is huge. Terrell Owens, Patrick Crayton, and Jason Witten obviously take huge value hits. I mean really, name the Dallas backup. Bueller? Bueller? It's Brad Johnson. Of USA Today 2003 All-Joe team and 2003 Pro Bowl "Quarterbacks Challenge" Winner fame. In 2003. Five years ago. He could be Romo's dad. Johnson is 40 years old. The only person who benefits from Johnson's rise to starterdom is Marion Barber. Bradley's friends call him "Checkdown Charlie." Others prefer the term grandpa. Barber's fantasy owners will be using the word Jesus. Barber, who during the absence of scat back Felix Jones for the next half-month-or-so due to another injury of the hamstring variety, will have huge reception numbers. The screen pass will become Barber's best friend. Expect tons of touches for the Barbarian to go with the oodles of touchdowns he already gets you fantasy owners out and expect less receptions, less yardage, and less big plays from the Dallas receivers. Also expect a Chris Mortensen "scoop" to come out in a couple minutes in an attempt by Mort to re-solidify himself as the true Bristol source-king. Then expect said "scoop" to be wrong and then for every sports blog in the wild, wild web to jump down his throat with clever one-liners and dry insults. Buy Romo low this week to stash him on your bench for when the elite QB comes back in a month; buy TO low next week after his owner begins to hate him and his three fantasy points-a- week glory as much as Jeff Garcia does; and submit your Romo broken-pinky jokes in the comment section right now.