I'm Officially An Expert. Eat It Knuckas,

So I occasionally post my greatness on this site called Bleacher Report. They actually love me over there. It's a pleasant change. They even think I'm an expert. So they invited me to be in a fantasy football experts draft. For experts. Like me. As of right now, the draft is a slow moving sloth that is taking place through email where people put in their picks whenever they get to it. So I'm going to have time after every round to make fun of everyone else. Not that I wouldn't make fun of them if it was going quickly, but now I have time to let you hear my rants here on FFWWH. No one will be spared. First Round: 1. Ladainian Tomlinson (Jacob Sloan) 2. Brian Westbrook (Me) 3. Adrian Peterson (Sean Crowe) 4. Joseph Addai (Russel Ivanac) 5. Steven Jackson (Collin Hager) 6. Tom Brady (Andrew Kneeland) 7. Randy Moss (Brendan McGair) 8. Clinton Portis (Matt Something) 9. Marshawn Lynch (Isaac Elyacharshuster) 10. Frank Gore (John Ferriola) The Bad - Dai Hard over SJax? A guy who barely had 1000 rushing yards and relies heavily on touchdowns over a guy who is one year removed from a 2300 total yard season and has the pieces from that season back from injury now? Do you also prefer Pepsi to Coke? - Randy Moss at 7? He's the number 1 wide receiver, but he's not going to break any records. Terrell Owens is a second rounder and won't put up that worse of numbers. Andre Johnson won't be far behind. Reggie Wayne could be right there also. You can't take Moss in the first round when Portis is on the board. I disagree with the Brady pick too, but I guess that can be justified somewhat. The Good - Portis at 8 is a steal. Like Danny Ocean status. Weapons around him that are good enough to ease some pressure but not good enough to take away a ton of opportunities in the offense, a guaranteed 300 carries, and 1500 total yards five out of his six NFL seasons make him arguably an elite back. Getting a consistent, great rb like him near the end of the first round also means you can grab a Larry Johnson type player on the turnaround and be in a safe enough situation where you can make the gamble on a high risk/enormous reward back without blinking an eye, and possibly end up with two elite backs. - Thank you Jacob Sloan for not giving in to the Adrian Peterson hype. He will be a disappointment of Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull proportions. At the end of the day, you don't want to have used the number 1 overall pick on a guy who can't last a full season without getting injured. Don't draft Adrian Peterson in hopes that he turns into The Dark Knight because all you're going to get is Hancock.